Finals, Fire Crotch, and Traffic Tickets OH MY
So for those who actually know me, they know that when final time is here I am a grumpy wreck! I feel and look like I literally crawled out of somethings ass. I end up being mean to the people I love. My fiance, (we will call him fire crotch for comedy sake. for those who havent figured it out, he is a redhead), is soooooo amazing to me. He cooks, bakes, cleans, THE WORKS! What do I do? Complain about finals. I snap at him for any little thing. Last night I actually snapped because he was laying to close to me in bed. Thats right, you can tell I am a real joy to be around. I swear I need professional help. I know its wrong, and I feel so guilty for being like this. I just cant stop it. Anyone have any suggestions?????
I actually do want to mention something that did make me smile last week. Not anything major, but it helped. Well last Wednesday I went to visit my parents for the holiday. Fire Crotch was headed to see his. I had class all morning long, and like a true procrastinator wasnt planning on packing until 5 minutes before I was ready to leave. So Im stressed over class, finals, etc. I unlock my apt door and to my surprise everything had been done for me. Fire Crotch washed, folded, and packed all of my clothes, toiletries (is that how you spell that), etc. He also washed dishes and took out the trash. I felt immediate relief. Finally a chance to relax. So I say "Thanks so much" and what does he say..Well I will tell you " I just thought I would get things done so we could spend some time together before we have to leave." So yes everyone I am an ass. I need to learn to relax and start appreciating what I have around me. My strings are wound up to tight at the moment.
To make matters worse (oh you thought this was over...) I GOT A TICKET. See now getting a ticket is bad, but getting a ticket from an overly cocky, smug, asshole of a cop makes it 10 times worse. He basically just yelled at me for anything and everything. I had Fire Crotch's license in my wallet because I had just taken him to get a procedure done. I dropped him off at home and left to get some lunch. Well anyhow back to the cop. I reach for my license and Deputy Dog sees that I have Fire Crotch's license. So he starts asking questions like:
Question: "This doesnt look like you. Why do you have someone else's license?"
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Well your a smart one. Of course this doesnt look like me!"
Answer: "I took my fiance to a medical procedure this morning. He asked me to hold it for him."
Question: "Does this person know you have their license?"
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Yes idiot!"
Actual Answer: "Yes, Sir."
Question: Why havent you shown me your proof of insurance?
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Why dont you drive off a cliff!?"
Actual Answer: "Here it is officer. Sorry about that"
Comment: "Drive Safe Mam"
INNERMONOLOGUE: "Go F*** Yourself Sir."
Actual Anwer: "Thank you, sir."
I can already tell this is going to be a fabulous week!
I actually do want to mention something that did make me smile last week. Not anything major, but it helped. Well last Wednesday I went to visit my parents for the holiday. Fire Crotch was headed to see his. I had class all morning long, and like a true procrastinator wasnt planning on packing until 5 minutes before I was ready to leave. So Im stressed over class, finals, etc. I unlock my apt door and to my surprise everything had been done for me. Fire Crotch washed, folded, and packed all of my clothes, toiletries (is that how you spell that), etc. He also washed dishes and took out the trash. I felt immediate relief. Finally a chance to relax. So I say "Thanks so much" and what does he say..Well I will tell you " I just thought I would get things done so we could spend some time together before we have to leave." So yes everyone I am an ass. I need to learn to relax and start appreciating what I have around me. My strings are wound up to tight at the moment.
To make matters worse (oh you thought this was over...) I GOT A TICKET. See now getting a ticket is bad, but getting a ticket from an overly cocky, smug, asshole of a cop makes it 10 times worse. He basically just yelled at me for anything and everything. I had Fire Crotch's license in my wallet because I had just taken him to get a procedure done. I dropped him off at home and left to get some lunch. Well anyhow back to the cop. I reach for my license and Deputy Dog sees that I have Fire Crotch's license. So he starts asking questions like:
Question: "This doesnt look like you. Why do you have someone else's license?"
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Well your a smart one. Of course this doesnt look like me!"
Answer: "I took my fiance to a medical procedure this morning. He asked me to hold it for him."
Question: "Does this person know you have their license?"
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Yes idiot!"
Actual Answer: "Yes, Sir."
Question: Why havent you shown me your proof of insurance?
INNER MONOLOGUE: "Why dont you drive off a cliff!?"
Actual Answer: "Here it is officer. Sorry about that"
Comment: "Drive Safe Mam"
INNERMONOLOGUE: "Go F*** Yourself Sir."
Actual Anwer: "Thank you, sir."
I can already tell this is going to be a fabulous week!
It IS going to be fabulous because you get to see me. I feel sorry for fire crotch. I feel his pain. Let him know that if he needs a support group I'm here - I have been through it with you after all.
Posted by
twisted panties |
1:24 PM
Post a Comment